Early on in my career, working in leadership roles, I tried to adapt my leadership style to that of the different hospitals I worked in.

There were many challenges, but I was flexible and committed to engaging staff to be a part of the change within the organization, and specifically, the Emergency Department.

I had great mentors as leaders, and then there were those that I had no idea how or even why, they got into a leadership.

There are some things that I learned:

1. It doesn’t matter if you are the most amenable leader, people will step all over you to get what they what, especially if they resist change.
2. Staff bully managers. There is so much out there about staff felling bullied or pressured by leadership to pick up extra shifts, for example, but no one talks about the bullying that staff does to leadership. (if you want to know more about my experiences, I’m happy to share real examples from my career).
3. If you don’t have a good relationship with upper management, then you aren’t going to be able to run your department and get the support you need.

My bookshelves are filled with various titles on leadership from the military to Disney. I have read them all cover to cover and at the end of the day, I learned that it really doesn’t matter.

That’s right, you heard me. It depends on the culture of the department. It’s a vibe that you have to feel and fit into.

I have worked for leaders with no experience but were put in the position because of who they were (yes, this does happen). This pushes out experienced nurses who feel devalued.

I have worked for leaders with so much experience that I just fangirled and wanted to be just like them.

All this to say, nothing will change until we accept that it has to. I am not saying that all change is good. In fact, there have been some changes that were so unsafe, I no longer wanted to jeopardize patient care or put myself in a situation that could potentially make me lose my license.

I have a habit of staying in places longer than I should. I keep telling myself that if I stay, I can help change and make things better. Sometimes that is true. Other times, I am just hurting myself.

My call to action for you all is to seek out opportunities that challenge you. Learn from different leaders and understand their leadership styles. Lastly, don’t compromise your mental health or well-being for something that you can’t change.

#adventureswithnursejamla